“Slow and steady really can win the race”

Top or Bottom, done right, a bit of upbeat lovemaking can set your day (and headboard) to new angles.

But it gets old, really fast, when it becomes predictable.

Truth is after a while we learn the tricks to our partner, the pressure points, the sensitive areas. And we get comfortable. But sex should have passion! And routine is anything but.

However; before toys and having threesomes (see my post on THAT here) you might want to try some gear changes.

Sounds simple but we can forget how much some slow, tender, kiss-by-kiss, sensual, deep and panting “notebook” sex can drive you both utterly crazy. Remember you are a sexy fucking beast and you can give him the night of his frikin life if you put your mind to it. Going slower is about confidence.

Listen to his body. Master it. Then set your imagination free!

“Threesomes are NOT a solution”

Its not like it is on PornHub.

Mainly because, in porn, the three men sweating away are pretty much strangers to each other (no matter how convincing their acting may be).

To have a threesome in the real world is to introduce a strange third party into a previously monogamous, committed relationship.

Therein lies the danger.

Here’s three things to check before you even THINK about bringing it up:

1.) Is this really what you need?

If you really want to be in love, to be loved and to have a balanced relationship; this arrangement doesn’t really make sense. Is there anything else going on that could make this a little less casual?

2.) Why would he say yes?

If he (your boyfriend) says yes to a threesome, you should probably think about whether he is saying yes because he genuinely wants one, or yes because he wants you to be happy. Both can be messy, but the latter will bring out shades to him later that you will not be able to undo as easily as a belt…

3.) How is your relationship?

Is this a fun ‘one-off’? Is it an arranged regular thing? Can your relationship take it? I’ve seen countless friends walk into the threesome scenario, when they’re a bit bored with their relationship and instead destroy the thing all together because it caused so much jealousy and misbalance and confusion to one, or both, parties.

Do you need a Threesome. Or do you need to talk?

“Grindr is not …

“Grindr is not a dating application…”

It means nothing.

He doesn’t value you. You don’t value him. If the only thing you knew about a person was what they had been doing that day, what time they were getting home and the colour of their pubic hair it’s probably not right to expect them to shed a tear when you part ways.

A hook-up is a hook-up. It’s short, its sweet and it’s simple.

Grindr is a HOOK-UP app. It was designed as a HOOK-UP app and until the day it stops listing your proximity in feet and allowing you to send your current location with pin-point, alley-way accuracy it will always BE a HOOK-UP app!

Want to make LOVE? Get your conversation off Grindr ASAP, keep it in your pants and off your camera roll, meet up, grab a drink, get food, expect to talk to each other and if you still WANT to kiss him after all that then maybe you can call it a date.

Until then you’re just two strangers who flashed each other over the internet.